Good News from the Resistance: Last week we learned about a new piece of Trump’s immigration policy — he dreamed of building a border moat, and filling it with alligators and snakes. His aides got cost estimates. The Good News? After three years, our Clown-in-Chief still has the ability to make me laugh so hard I fell off the couch. The Really Good News? This was just one of a litany of reminders of the childish ineptness of the current Administration. To quote my friend Billy Shore, who leads a national anti-hunger organization, “(their) incompetence has worked in our favor.” To which I say, Praise Ye Incompetence!
Our Reality TV star-in-Chief made a lot of campaign promises, yet after close to 1,000 days in the White House, he’s failed to deliver. Thanks to his stunning incompetence, and a bit of help from his loyal and corrupt henchmen and dangerously clueless family, he’s been unable to: ban all Muslims from entering the U.S.; remove Syrian refugees; create a Commission on radical Islam; build a wall (or a moat) and make Mexico pay for it; end birthright citizenship; cancel federal aid to sanctuary cities; expand fast-track deportation; add a citizenship question to the U.S. Census; change the vaccination schedule for children; or bring back waterboarding. Obamacare still stands, Mt. Denali has not be renamed Mt. McKinely, Medicaid is not funded through block grants to states, and $20 billion has not been invested in “school choice.” Praise Ye Incompetence!
But that’s legislation; our Grifter-in-Chief ran on a “this country needs a businessman who knows how to run things!” platform. How’s he doing with that?
Our Bankrupter-in-Chief already — with a year to go — holds the record for both Cabinet and White House turnover; he’s lost more Cabinet heads to ethics violations and corruption than any president in U.S. history, and underlings who don’t buy what he’s selling (Comey, Scaramucci, McCabe, Shulkin, Sessions, Omarosa, Bolton) are dismissed by the boss with his signature phrase, “You’re fired!” Which is why White House morale is so low (former WH chief-of-staff John Kelly said, “working for Donald Trump was the worst fucking job I’ve ever had”), that we, the taxpayers, are footing an $18,000 bill for a White House executive coach. (Good luck with that). Let’s hope the coach continues to be unable to control the gut-bustingly funny mistakes and retributive leaks. Praise Ye Incompetence!
And yet. While our Baffoon-in-Chief continues to outdo his own mendacity, unlikely fixers are stepping up. Auto manufacturers are fighting Trump’s relaxed air pollution and emissions rules. Walmart is filling a void on gun policy. Greta has mobilized young people across the world, and she will not stop. Cities like L.A. are out in front on electric vehicle adoption. Amazon just ordered 100,000 electric delivery vans; FedEx ordered 1,000 more.
Note to our National Clown: This is how you run a thriving business. Praise Ye Competence!
Yes, there’s even more Good News from the Resistance:
- Laugh at Andy Borowitz’s Civil War podiatrist joke
- Be amazed that the $70 billion U of California pension fund is now fossil-free
- Know that Cleveland paid anti-Trump protestors almost $1 million for wrongful arrests
- Plan to visit this NYC arts center dedicated to immigrants
- Applaud New Mexico for making college free
- See history being made with this ocean clean-up
- Wonder how Trump feels about paying ACLU & immigrant rights groups $6.6 million+
- Be impressed by Warren’s pinky promise
- Use this impeachment diagram to keep track of shady Ukraine players
- Take Action: Find an #ImpeachNow march, and take to the streets Sunday, Oct. 13
Sign Up. Show Up. Never Give Up.
WE ANDY BOROWITZ
Do you think Trump reads him?
WE THE UNIVERSITY OF CALIFORNIA
Great universities in fabulous locations. And now this.
WE THE 1st AMENDMENT
And Cleveland does, too.
WE VISITING NYC
And soon we’ll have another performing arts center to support.
WE FREE COLLEGE
If one state can do it, why can’t they all?
WE RIDDING THE OCEANS OF PLASTIC
And after many false starts, it looks like this organization has figured out how to do it.
WE WHEN TRUMP HAS TO PAY FOR HIS MENDACITY
The bill for his botched census question is $6.6 million … and rising.
WE PINKY PROMISES
And having positive role models in public office. How refreshing.
WE UNDERSTANDING TRUMP’S UKRAINE FAMILY TREE
The Ukraine story keeps getting more complicated and weird. This graphic explains relationships between the players (as of now).
WE TAKING ACTION: Find an #ImpeachNow march, and take to the streets Sunday, October 13.